Resistance to Push

Two years ago, I had an energy healing that changed the direction of my life. That is when I had my greatest aha yet.

I am a highly In-Tune Intuitive Psychic Medium & Channel.

Less than 6 months later, June 11, 2022 (a year before my baby’s birth) I stepped out and very shyly owned my gifts doing readings at a vendor event. Shortly after that, I began taking energy healing clients.

I had mastered how to fully step into trusting myself enough to assist others in connecting to their bodies.

Then I got pregnant and felt a block in my work. My inner wisdom was guiding me to be as present as possible in my pregnancy, to become a student to my daughters spirit and soak up every flutter and kick.

After experiencing the trauma of her loss, I wobbled between jumping right back into things and taking my time to soften and be gentle on myself…

So many others needed so much time after loss, don’t I? Am I supposed to lay sullen in bed everyday? Wasn’t it wrong of me to move forward from this tragedy? While also hearing “everyone grieves in their own way.” I felt so lost. There were many days I sat in bed contemplating all of this and what I should or shouldn’t be doing, it was very confusing.

One thing I know for certain is…my daughter wanted me to live. Yes, there will be and are many bad days but what if I embrace the good days just as much?

I thrive in energy readings. It’s my most effortless work. I become the vessel. I channel messages that are meant for others. I know this to be a piece of my purpose.

But after her birth…I felt so blocked. I was disappointed in myself, yet again. Because the one thing I was so good at, I couldn’t even do…and in those moments, I was asked to lean back and honor the resistance. It was there for a reason.

And that reason was my up-level.

I had to come back home to myself. I had to reconnect to my body, mind and spirit. I had to sit in discomfort of the pain of her loss. I had to honor exactly what my body needed.

Magnolia was brought to me as tangible proof her spirit is real. She is my connection to other realms. She is proof to me that all of this is real.

Once I began stepping out more…I began stepping back into my power.

I had to reacquaint myself and get comfortable (in my body) again. As I did this, my gifts started expanding beyond just reading the energy in front of me. I see, hear, feel and know things for others that don’t make logical sense. I feel animals and ancestors. More potent abilities, called for more potent processing. I had to reevaluate my systems and try new things.

Which is why I share this story…sometimes instead of pushing and forcing…we must release the pressure and embrace the block and trust it’s all happening because we aren’t meant to push through it. We are meant to effortlessly receive.

And even though change is scary, it’s leading me to the next version of myself my daughter knew I could be.